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2012If Only… – I Could Get Used to This Lifestyle
After a week of partying with Wildside friends, there is a temptation for those of us who are struggling with the place of our feminine side in our lives to think that a week of such fun validates this lifestyle choice.
After all, we find friendship and common ground, we have no issues with acceptance and no need for pretence. And, quite understandably, our hearts soar.
The Pink Fog
We are liberated from our worries, freed of our real-world shackles, welcomed with open arms and smiles and laughter, and exposed to the company of role models and sisters of the same feather.
…and none of it would be possible without being T.
The people we meet would not be as open to meeting others if they weren’t T (we all know that making any new friends in middle age is tough, nevermind great friends). We wouldn’t be as needy without being T. The greatness of the people we meet is inseparable from their T-ness. The ease with which we all find common ground is tied into being T. And, so on…
It is almost irresistible to contemplate that our everyday lives could be just the same, if only…
And, who would not want to live that kind of happy life that comes with such abundant love and happy times?
The Blues of Real Life
So, it is important to remember that, as much as we feel and act like giddy teenagers for that week, we are adults with families and jobs and responsibilities and real-life issues.
It is important to remember that a party is fun for a week, but we all need the challenges and sense of accomplishment that real life brings. Besides, none of us could keep it up much longer than a week. To riff on the well-known saying, “all play and no work makes Janie a poor, boring and useless girl.”
(I wonder what our gathering would turn into if we stayed together for a month rather than a week…)
It is important to remember that in the real world, being a tgirl is being an outcast, not a rockstar like in Vegas, that being T makes everything harder, not easier.
If you are T, celebrate and enjoy it. Just don’t think you can take Wildside on the road with you, except in little moments here and there.
Shirley Corning
Well Janie I certainly agree that being a T makes life pretty tough in a number of ways. The term gender conflicted should be classified as an understatement for one thing. It makes me smile when I remember Dr. Richard Docter asking, “Why can’t you guys just relax and enjoy it?” Good question doctor. While I think I know what you mean I wouldn’t say it makes everything harder. As for being an outcast it seems almost everyone, T or not, overestimates the extent to which a T will be rejected and discriminated against in the real world. It’s just not that bad. I say that based on my own experience but few believe me or they assume there’s some special reason I am or think I am an exception. I have no magic powers and live on the same planet. I’m a scientist and majored in physics. I don’t just sit around theorizing. I test the theories in the real world to prove what’s true and what’s not. I’m finding what Henry Ford said to be true, “You can think you can or you can think you can’t and either way you’re right.”
Pass me another brain Igor. lol
cdjanie
You do have courage. I too have had little problem, but I suspect others may object to your assertions.
Shirley Corning
A Jewish gal told me I had putsvah, the Yiddish word for bravery, courage and nerve. I say I have a terminal case of Cebriballsie where the balls continue to slowly harden until they’re solid brass. It wouldn’t surprise me if no one else here comments on my assertions but I am aware that there are some places in the US where a T will get a harder time than here in Southern California. It hasn’t been perfect but other than an initial dispute with my daughter the little bit of static has been of no consequence and unimportant. I’m certainly grateful for that.
Sweet dreams all,
Shirley