Nov

03

Non-Verbal Communication

Health and Beauty / Transgender Life  Posted by / 0 comments

Coming across as a woman involves communicating as one – and that’s a much broader concept than one’s actual voice.

Far from the direct and monotone, goal-oriented communication that men use, female speech is differently motivated and but one part of a much more complex form of communication.

To effect a feminine voice, you want to have an acceptable pitch – which is what most of us focus upon.  But, there are plenty of women with low voices who are never mistaken for men.  So dwell on that for a moment.

Read More»
Nov

01

The Ups and Downs of Switching Genders

Introspection / Transgender Life  Posted by / 29 comments

I gave the issues I last wrote about some more thought, and have a few ideas to share.

For me, being female is a joyous and intense state.  I am sociable, flirty and “on.” Being a guy is more of a contented and relaxed, comfortable thing.  Appropriate adjectives include strong, aware, capable.img_4100a_thumb

Being Janie is still quite stressful for me – not so much about being discovered, or worrying about danger any more, but more about doing things that are outside my comfort zone.

I still have so much to remember to do (and not do) when being a woman, from voice to manner to posture – things that are not yet completely innate to me.

And then, socializing is not something that comes easily to me.  Though I have revelled in the friendships and interactions that I have achieved as Janie, meeting people has never been without stress for me.

Read More»
Oct

30

Equal and Opposite

Introspection / Transgender Life  Posted by / 14 comments

I hate to rain on the parade of the “I told you so”’s out there, but my wonder and joy at feeling so feminine while spending a solid week living as a woman has given way to an equal and opposite masculine feeling.

Since I have been back, I have had to be in a male mindset non-stop for almost a week, managing construction and landscaping issues and other business matters.  (Don’t ask!)

After all that solid guy time, my intention to switch to girly mode today for a Halloween Party tonight and tomorrow night has met with no small amount of internal resistance.

Read More»
Oct

29

Inner Voice

Health and Beauty / Transgender Life  Posted by / 8 comments

During this week, I have made a point of concentrating on the way I speak.  I mentioned last time that I took a voice lesson and attended seminars at Fantasia.  But, what I want to talk about now is what I am learning from myself, having spent the week focusing on my speech.

This is the first time I have not let myself off the hook in terms of communicating as a woman.  In public, in private, alone or on stage, talking to others or to myself (yes, I am nuts!), I insisted from myself that I speak as a woman.

I usually let my guard down when walking on the street or sitting at home talking about stuff with GF.  Not this week.  If I got upset, I’d often tend to fall back into guy voice to cope; not this week.  In fact, any time I found myself faltering in any way, I’d excuse myself and go to the bathroom and regroup (something that became less necessary as the week wore on).

Read More»
Oct

28

Girl Talk

Health and Beauty / Transgender Life  Posted by / 7 comments

img_4590aThis Fantasia Fair had a surprisingly intense focus on voice.  Three speech pathologists were in attendance, and 4 seminars on offer, as well as private sessions available.

I took full advantage.

My personal assessment of my female voice is that it is not bad, but could stand improvement.  I wanted a professional assessment, as well as some tools to use in order to better myself.

So, I met privately with one of the professionals.

The session began with her engaging me in conversation about myself and my interests, while, unbeknownst to me, a spectrometer was measuring my voice.

Read More»