(…continued from The Answer to My Prayers)

Old habits die hard.

I have talked about wanting to change the focus of my lifestyle from the safe and conservative, middle of the road to something more interesting and beautiful and sublime – painting outside the lines if you will… and that Janie’s appearance in my life helps move me in that direction.

As much as the first part of my life has been successful by many measures, it isn’t what I want. Not to take anything for granted, it’s just not enough.

Still, the kind of change I’m talking about is not easy.  The people you know expect the same thing from you that they have always had, and I can’t help but cling to the things upon which I have founded my existence for lo these many decades. Self-doubt is natural.

And, one of the main doubts is about Janie.

Truth be told, there are many ways to make incremental changes to guide my life in a different direction and add some of the things I have talked about. Much can be accomplished without resorting to something as earth-shattering as adopting the opposite gender.

You’d think…

…but then again, this exercise isn’t about practicality, is it?